I want to give you all an update from Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.
The last 2 weeks were head spinning;
-H acts as if he is no longer seeing OW that he's been practically engaged to for the past year.
I find out that he's having her meet him at a resort where he's competing & ask him if it's true.
He tells me he will break up b/f the trip & wants to R when I draw the line in the sand.
He tells me he "did it" & leaves on the trip. I find out she's there & call him when I know they're in the car for 4 hours & he will have to call me back. For the 1st time, I call her # & leave a short message "I understand you're w/ my H right now, just a suggestion, have him tell you the truth since he's a bit truth challenged."
-Comes right over & tells me he had intended to break it off, but after the trip, can we get back together?
Oops, still doesn't end it & cont their R.
-I let him know that after a year of this (actually more, starting on Easter Sunday year b/f last when he got angry for a made up reason & spent the night w/OW that I didn't know existed), I was ready to move on.
-Finally calls & tells me he "told her" after missing the memorial service I had for my father & spending the night w/her last Saturday.
Here's where it all changed for me;
After spending all day Sunday together & coming back to the house for a kid free evening together, he turns cold & tells me @ almost midnight that he made a mistake. He really loves her & is going to leave, "sorry, I just like being with her more & don't feel comfortable w/you."
I ask him to please spend the night, not to leave me alone like that. I didn't care if it degraded me, I just wanted to get thru the night. He did, then woke up in the morning to tell me he would give it until the end of the day to decide.
I can't even say how I felt, as CVA said later (after he said "if Nomo & I weren't in Texas, we come kick his b*** there right now), he might as well have been hitting me, it had the same effect.
So, I turned a corner & distanced myself. Not angry, just business like, exchanging info re;kids, etc. He's also not free to come in the house & "hang" w/ the kids, he can take them out or to his house.
Shoe is now on the other foot, so to speak. So far he's begged, pleaded & literally gotten on his knee's to have me take him back. Many attempts @ telling me he's going to move forward on renting a place, keep S5 for overnights 50% (etc.)now, if I won't give us another chance. I asked him to stop w/the threats, it's not casting him in a good light & certainly not someone that I would ever consider R'ing with.
-He tells me he's just doing all this b/c he's scared to death.
Amazing, I have a year of this with him telling me he wants a D, has a GF that he spends most of his time with & he's falling apart after 3 days!!
I think he needs to be in this place long enough to really "get it."
