Well the 2.5 weeks with no D conversation is over. W forced a meeting to negotiate all of the issues and I did not want it and was not negotiating. W was upset about all of the paperwork and time and kid issues that the D filing is causing. I told her that she decided to do this, not me, and she needs to live with the results and that she can stop it at any time. I cannot take the blame for the D filing and its impact when I not only did not file, but totally disagreed with the filing. The W was bitter, mean and miserable in the discussion. There was fire and lightning bolts shooting from her eyes and very deep level of hatred. I can see now that all of the guilt, pain, misery, etc of the D that she initaited is being directed at me. It is like she stuck her hand in the fire and when it hurt she blamed me for the fire being so hot. I feel deflated yet relieved. My DBing is having no measurable impact. The legal part of this thing has become a self perpetuating anger machine. The good part is that she can see that the D process is hard and she will not get what she wants. I don't know how you can work on the R when there is this much anger with each step of the legal process.
