Even if the adultery reference in a filing does not improve your settlement, H knows that is who he is so I say have your L call him just that, honestly, in writing. You will probably feel better knowing the facts are on the record.
The sooner you get some support matters on the record the sooner you can quit worrying how he will fall short at the next turn. Taking the arbitrary negotiations out of the equation will be for the best. It will prevent the kids from becoming financial pawns.
Keep smiling. And start planning to do more of that. Remember though that you can't give H any reason to make false accusations about you in court. Wouldn't he enjoy that after he has dishonored his vows so badly?
