My story

[CBK]

ROP - Glad to see you back on, I was worried about you.

Sounds like a lot is going on. Remember, this is a roller coaster, you need to be doing this for yourself, not her. I am not the model her, but have gotten a lot of good advice from my fellow posters. Detaching is good and sounds like you are doing it, I am not sure how to "lovingly" detach as I can't even detach, but am trying.

Don't get vindictive, don't date to get even, that is the last thing you should do. I had the same feelings about the OM, but you cannot change her, only yourself and hopefully she will come out of the fog. If she doesn't, you will be a happier person as will your kids. Self-esteem doesn't come in a one-night stand, it comes from who you are. I think I told you or posted somewhere, when this is all done, I will have my dignity no matter what. I will fight until the papers are signed, and I may continue after that. These are choices we make. Keep you mind off of OM - if OM is a deal breaker, that is something you will have to face and others will give you great advice. We have chose a road that is rocky, bumby, hilly and with huge pot holes - we may get our M and R back - only God knows that - but remember, YOU and your KIDS are the most important things in your life right now.

I hope this helps. I will be back in town next week, let's grab that beer! I work close to the airport - let's plan on somehting.

CBK