I am right there with you except that there was a great spark at one time. Once we said "I do" the spark disappeared for her (she had some childhood abuse issues that were probably the cause).
In any case, I told her I wanted a divorce back in January and she talked me into trying some more and has been trying to create that connection. Intimacy for us is extremely awkward now and pretty much has been since we got married and she started using our relationship as her emotional landfill. But I digress...
Now, the problem is that I got to the point where I did not want to be with her anymore. After 6 years of being beaten down by her and her legitimate issues, being intimate with her is the last thing on my mind.
Do I think you can create a connection? Maybe, but it's not likely and if you do IT WILL TAKE A HELLUVA LOT OF WORK to get there. I cannot stress this enough! If you BOTH are not willing to work yourselves nearly to death to create that connection it is not going to happen. If you even are able to create that connection, it will likely take years to accomplish.
Since you don't have kids I would believe your wife, step up and get out. You are going to be ok and so is she. You are in this for a partnership AND a friendship. Not just a friendship...you can get that at the pub.
I am not trying to throw a wet blanket on you but I just want to tell you what this has been like in my marriage.
