yes, i know, to let him go... and it so hard when he is around. the issue of sex actually is a simple one - there is more clarity and boundaries are better defined but it is so easy to entangle in all our past emotional dynamics i purposefully make myself scarce to lessen chances to be engulfed by him - i feel like that sometimes, due to his intensity and my inability to put my guards up (still new behavior for me) and be strong.
actually that is another reason why to let him go - i am not ready. i do not feel strong enough. both emotionally and socially/financially.
it seems that his next trip is on 18. so 12 more days - i can do it. the time when the kids will be around will be tough.
me, h - 40+ m-20+ s, d, ss - 20+ s, ow, pa since 04.2007 h back and forth 01.2008 - 05.2008 h decided to be w/ow 05.13.2008 http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1415899&page=1&fpart=1
but it is so easy to entangle in all our past emotional dynamics 
i purposefully make myself scarce to lessen chances to be engulfed by him - i feel like that sometimes, due to his intensity and my inability to put my guards up (still new behavior for me) and be strong. 
