Your list kind of just makes it sound like your H just needs to grow up. Was he responsible pre-bomb?
I don't think you are naive and your sitch is not hopeless...none of us knows what the future holds and it is a wonderful thing to have hope...but that being said, make sure you aren't putting your life on hold because of that hope. I think it is great that you are moving and starting fresh in a new place...focus on that for now and keep finding things that make you happy regardless of your H. Who knows what will happen when you start making changes in your life...positive changes you are making for you.
I read what you posted on my thread about making a list of goals for yourself. You are right it can be a little difficult...is that because we don't really want to look at ourselves? I am going to start figuring out my list. I be looking for yours too.
Good luck with your move...hopefully you have lots of help.
