Changing myself for myself

[Firekeeper]

h brought some cut fruit plate he bought in the store. he said that he bought it for me. i said thank you but, no thank you.

he asked if we would not have sex(!) but could we be friendlier - "for kids sake" (granted two of the kids are not at home now, but in college and the third one doesn't see much of our interaction anyway). i said that i am preparing myself to be friendly when we will be with all the kids (during graduations, etc)

he said that he also thought about bartering - he bought me fruit and i would do him his favorite sandwich. i said that i will do a sandwich for him anyway. and i did. and i didn't sit to eat with him but took my tea to my room.

he tried to engage me more in his conversations - i called him up on it and said that i am not into talking. well the way he approached was very peculiar - he started to tell about his friend that he just talked on the phone who shared that it took her 8 years to find out what she wanted from life. he added (with a laughter), that he doesn't know if i will be able to wait for him for so long. i shrug my shoulders. he said that he began to understand that family values are important to him. i said that i am glad that it has such an importance for him. he answered swiftly - not "such" an importance... so i just repeated my "i am glad that ..." statement using exactly the phrase he used and went away

i prepared myself and follow thorough with a very short interaction addressing my two concerns. 1st that in couple days i expect him to became depressed and lashing out - his usual tendency after coming back from trips. he said that it may be different because he is better adjusting to time change, etc. this time. i just wanted him to be aware about this trend, so i accomplished it. and second i asked him not to do or buy or write for mothers day. he said that it would be ... i do not remember what word he used , something like weired... i answered that it was ok for him last year....

he asked if he can buy flowers at least, i kinda flirted saying that no and he doesn't know what kind of flowers i like now anyway

i look very sexy and beautiful today