for better,for worse,for (what)ever

[Evie]

seek, I replied to you the other day and then hit the wrong button and lost everything.

I hear you on your recent post, this is absolutely where I am and I don't think you are controlling.

I'm not very good at verbalising my emotions, but what you write is helping me tremdously.

It is a trauma we are facing, unlike a death which is final, we face an uncertain future that presently we have no/little control over, you and i know both know we want our H's - for better/worse, if we didn't we could draw a line under everything and say enough is enough, i can't go on like this.

I'm a homebody to and could have had as much freedom as I wanted, but i preferred to spend time in the house and like you i have a busy job, where i mix with people all day, in my down time I like to be quiet too. Don't beat yourself up about this.

I have BF, her and her h are opposites too, she is very sociable and her h is very quiet, they draw a compromise and make sure they have some time together every day. They are also luck to have a supportive mom who looks after her kids so they can get away for 1 week every year on their own.

I wanted to mention that any changes in the house that i made, ie I moved teh furniture around and put away some pictures, H noticed it, he commented and I'm not sure if he liked the changes or not, I think he wanted things to stay the same for some reason.

Also when he moved into his new flat in Feb and I bagged up some of his clothes, he seemed upset about this as well and made the comment - 'do you want me to clear the loft, garage and shed too?'

I think a plan would be to maybe sit still for a while. You and H are not going backwards, so thats good. Put his stuff away if that makes you able to cope, I did this and it did help. Although I have to say that not once have i slept on his side of the bed and the bolster pillows are still in the same place in the morning as they were when i got into bed.

I'm not good at saying what i mean, but I think you are doing well.

((((Seek))))