Help Me Act AS IF, Part 5

[cw68]

LMG, as long as you are passive-aggressive too nothing good will happen, just as it didn't when your H was. Trust me, I know as we were in similar sitches.

My advice to you is to accept this to a point. I went on-line and looked at what a separation agreement looked like. I researched all the different aspects to it and wrote down a ton of questions for the two of us to go through regarding finances, what would happen if one violated agreed upon terms, whether either of us could take the kids out of town, whether or not we should get a divorce account's advice, etc. This avoided us having to do it legally and we still aren't legally separated. My H was going, it was plain as day, just like it is at your house. Wrong, perhaps, but inevitable.

Four months later we still aren't legally separated and things are changing, they are getting better. Whether or not they get better enough to make him come home, we'll see. Regardless, it gave us time and the basis to work together and our kids are benefiting from it. From a practical standpoint, I am benefiting from it, too. We'll still need a six-month mandatory separation should we divorce and this is making my spousal support longer. His 401k has been growing, the same with our other investments.

Only you can decide your next move, but making a move will make you feel better even if it's not the move you want.