This jumped out at me... In a way, this is a non-answer. I mean, so what? I was "just me" before my W went off the deep end. Now, I'm a different "just me." Seems to me (and I know it's not for a lack of effort on your part) your H needs to get on board with getting some guidance on how to have a fulfilling R (as though you didn't know). Perhaps this is something that can be brought up in C?
I know what you're going to say..."I left X, Y, and Z books out for H, even highlighted some spots, but he won't read them." You know, LL, if he REALLY wants to work things out here, then he needs to put forth the effort. Rs take effort, as we all know. These things are not instinctive...they are learned through trial and error, paying attention to the signs, and actively trying to fill the (appropriate) tank of one's S. This, IMHO, is what your H needs to get his arms around. Now how to make him realize this???
You know, after my W read "5 Love Languages," the lightbulb went on. In doing this she realized that I have needs that are different than hers (duh). Can you TWIST your H's arm on this one? Heck, it's a small book!
