Peace, Thank you for the encouragement. I needed it. For some reason, I feel a little discouraged tonight. It was very busy at work and for some reason, I didn't want to leave work. I was trying to figure out how to send pictures from my home to my email account - didn't work. Ended up sving them to the service provider website album.
For some reason, I missed my H alot today. I didn't feel like coming home to my "empty" house. Except my dog needed me... Poor baby - I feel like I don't give her enough attention.
Before leaving work tonight, I replied his email response - very brief. He should get it tomorrow morning. I thanked him for his kind words and told him that I am much happier and more peaceful inside, and wished him a good day. -PH
PH Hi thanks you as well for all your insight and encouragement on my thread sounds like alot of positive interactions lately hope you are doing well tonight
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
Hi Peace, I am glad to be able to offer encouragement and support.
On Thu night I sent a very meaningful email to my stepsons, cc'ing my H. I am not sure if he looked at it. No response to that or my email response (thanking him for his kind words about my changes). I didn't ecpect a response, though.
Praying that my H is working on himself and that he trusts that my changes are sufficient for us to have a great M. Remember Michele's "it takes one to tango"?
I went out to dinner and movie tonight with 2 GFs and had a wonderful time. I was feeling tired and was worried I'd be bad company but it turned out really well.
Had a sweet dream last night. Don't remember too much of it, except that my H was in the dream and he said he wanted to be "romantic". So, today, I toyed with the idea of leaving him a cheeky voicemail telling him about what I dreamt he said.
But of course, I didn't do that (at least not yet, and not sure if I will). Today, I really did feel like being light-hearted and teasing with him.
I ended up emailing him to ask for the link he wanted to email me - the topic that made me cry and triggered our last R talk (2 weeks ago). But no mention of the dream.
Update: After sending that email, I honestly felt a weight lifted off my shoulders. The email included 2 pics from my trip, my request for the info he offered to send me, and a link to my church's online sermons.
And this morning, he sent a very sweet response. He liked my pics and complimented my smile. He sent me a few links to information he felt passionately about and had mentioned wanting to share with me (but which had upset me before and triggered the last R talk). And he even suggested that God might be telling me something important. He even sent a "huge hug" to our dog.
It seems he is acknowledging having belief in God. For this and the other things in the response, I am grateful and thankful.
Tonight my sister suggested that I invite my H to go somewhere with me for a vacation. She very generously offered use of her timeshare place. I thanked her and told her that I will have to find a good time to ask him. I also asked her to pray for my H.
Well, Thu evening, I responded to my H's offer to help me (in his email response). He would have gotten the email this morning. Have not heard back as to when he would help me...
I just got back from ballroom dance practice. I forced myself to go to it because I felt tired and just felt like vegging out at home. But I t went because I thought it'd do me good to get out of the house. I went and danced quite a bit. It was a good time.
Something interesting happened yesterday. While walking through my work parking lot yesterday morning, a certain licence plate suddenly stood out. I don't normally look at the licence plates but this one really stuck out! It read "BABYDOL". Before the S, my H very often called me this (I think when he felt close to me). He has not used this endearment since the S. I really thought it strange that this caught my attention. It felt as if God was telling that he's restoring my M.
Yesterday, I was touched by a "friend". She told me how her sister went through hell during her H's MLC. Her sister prayed with the help of another woman, AND there was a happy ending. Now her H is really following God and they have a wonderful M, better than when they first fell in love!! It felt like God was inspiring me!!
Today, I was prepared for an uneventful day. But, I ended up going to lunch with a friend from Church! It was totally impromptu and I had a great time at lunch chatting.
Then I got groceries and cooked for a couple of hours, did laundry, walked my dog. At about 8pm, I got a text message - from my stepson (SS#2)! He wished me "Happy Mother's Day"!!! I could not believe it.... That didn't happen last year and I just assumed it won't this year either. I assumed they were confused about whether I was still their stepmom or not. So I cried and thanked God!
SS#2 called about 3 times tonight during TV commercials (because they were watching a really good TV show).
So God sent me some angels today....
Not sure if they are coming up this summer. I hope they do. My H (and I) would be so disappointed if they don't. They would be disappointed too. We hardly see them as it is.
PH Hi sometimes I have done that too Ill see a plate that says lin I think good sign the other day I looked at my plate it has my exact birthdate year month and day it has my sons intials and the letter X It also caught my eye?? peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
May 12th's Charlyne Cares newsletter really rang a bell to me: 1) Instead of easily giving up on those He has chosen, God pursues them, making it more and more uncomfortable for them to keep running. 2) Stubbornness and pride are no match for God! --- I have been praying fervently about this so this really hit home... 3) Despite free will, God works in ways that are greater than we can fathom. Instead of getting discouraged when you see the choices your prodigal continues to make, pray without ceasing.
