I have a lot of very good male friends - I count many of them among my closest friends.
However, I have a rule if they have significant others - I have to meet their significant others and they have to be comfortable with our friendship.
Sadly that inflexible policy has recently resulted in the loss of a friendship. He recently got engaged. He has shared with me that she was jealous of his friendship with other women. The last time we spoke I told him point blank - the next time we meet - if we do - will be with him and his fiancee. And that we would not be talking by phone anymore until I met his fiancee. I have not heard from him since.
Male Female friendships are great and can be very fulfilling. But when a person become involved in a P-type of R - that R should take precedence over all other R's. I am not saying that those other R's need to be eliminated - they have their place just not above a P-type of R. If your friend cannot do that or cannot make you feel like you are No. 1 - keep looking till you find someone that does.
Sounds to me like that No. 1 spot is already occuppied. Time to move on.
BTW: I think it is great that you are deciding what you want! Nothing on your list is unreasonable. You have a right to want those things in an R.