I've read up on your sitch and I can understand where you are and what you are thinking. The lonliness is terrible, but I don't recommend dating right now. It will only lead to troubles for you both as you will need a lot of time to move past your current sitch and wouldn't want to drag baggage into a new relationship. It sucks to be alone, but you should wait.
However, that doesn't mean you have to not interact w/ people. Going out is a good thing for you. Just don't go out to find "Mr. Right" b/c he won't be there.
Now, on to your other question of a man wanting to date a woman w/ a baby. I know where these feelings are from b/c I too have struggled w/ the idea that I'd have some sort of a scarlet letter on me showing women out there that I'm defective or something b/c I have a W who wants to divorce me. It isn't true, but it feels real. You'll be fine in the end. When it is the right time to date, you'll be fine. Also, the lonliness does get easier w/ time and w/ activity. The busier you stay, the better it is. If your activities can include other people, it makes the time go that much faster.
About your H and his OW, I would suggest that you mention her as little as possible. He knows you know about her, so the only thing you can accomplish by bringing her up is more pressure on him to stay away. Instead, you need to allow him to do what he's doing w/out comment and let him make his own choices. The reason we DB is to make ourselves better and to understand that we will be ok on our own if that is what happens. This is a very difficult concept and I struggled to get it myself.
However, time again is your friend here as things do get easier in time. I'm now in my 3rd month since being served and it is easier and easier to try and detach from my W's day-to-day life. I realized there isn't anything I can do to stop her actions, so if I worry and obsess about them, all it does is expend my energy. It has taken me what seems like FOREVER to begin to get this, but it has only been 3 months. Thus, the clock moves slowly, but a little time will make a big difference.
I was able to get the reason to DB mainly b/c of the wonderful people here on this site. They encourage me when needed and kick my a$$ when that is called for as well. This is a terrific community of caring and concern and I'm sure you'll continue to find excellent advice that will help you as it has helped me.
Finally, remember we are DBing to make lasting, positive changes in ourselves. We can make these changes and present them for our partners to see, but that is really as far as we can go. Once we reach that point, it is up to our partners to turn and look our way. We can't force them to look at us, so there is no guarantee they will come back. The only thing DBing can guarantee is we'll be better people, partners, and parents in the future.
