D was sick and he was called at 11 in the evening, his response was i don't feel like coming if i really don't have to.....makes me made. Anyway i get a call later on and he asks where i am so i reply in car on way to hospital to have d checked. He says call when u get home. I did and told him I will sort it out. Few minutes later get a message that he is coming over. He stayed til 2am. I then heard nothing from him for 4 days. Then he arrived for his scheduled visit. I don't get it, not one call to ask how d is. Maybe some men out there can explain this to me cos I would die for my child!
Anyway d got sicker and ended up at Dr 3 times and needed to be nebulized. H did not call once to see how she was so I eventually called him and asked if he was in or out (not m cos he already said he 100% wants d, living new life with ow but still no D papers filed)in his d's life cos what he is doing is halfhearted. He came to visit in his usual time 2 days later, acted all sweet and then heard nothing from him until today. His visits have become shorter and shorter, from an hour and a half to 45 mins. He is preoccupied with new life and is visiting as a duty (I think).
Hi Sideswiped!Glad to see you back although sorry for what you are going through! Your H's lack of caring about very sick D is horrible! I don't understand it; I really don't!
I do think your H sounds a little like mine. Could he be having an MLC do you think? Or it could just be that he's in the honeymoon stage with OW? My H was like that for a while. He had always been a good dad but when he started with OW he would make promises to D8 to take her places and then break his plans most of the time so he could take the OW out instead!
I think my H realized when he moved out and the kids didn't care much and weren't upset to see him go, how he had affected their relationship. Since then for the last month or so he has really been trying to see the kids frequently and has been a much better dad. So hopefully your H will have that kind of realization at some point also?
I haven't filed for divorce yet b/c I am waiting to see if H gets through his MLC and/or affair with ow and comes out of the (mental) fog or whatever and realize what he is doing. H also has said a lot of weird stuff: he'll have more money after divorce (although twice the expenses), he'll have more time at his job--the same job he hasn't been able to get a day off for the past 8 years, and I'll meet someone and be happier, etc. He's kind of in fantasyland now and I'm hoping at some point he will be more realistic and may feel differently about divorce. If not, like you say I'll have a better relationship with someone else.
I do think at some point our Hs will realize they are making mistakes, but hopefully it won't be too long or it will be too late for them! Karen
I don't understand it; I really don't! 
