Fan-flipping-tastic trip! I would love to go back at some point and *not* do the whirlwind tour thing. That was exhausting, but a great way to see the whole country for $1000. Highly recommend taking the tour we took- totally worth the price; we must have saved at least $1000/person. Now we have a better idea of where we would like to go for extended periods of time.
We were there for 12 days- ML every day for 15 days in a row, often 2 or 3 times a day.
Highlights- -on the way to the airport (and a few other times during the trip) he said he loved me more than anyone else in the whole world
-other people on the tour thought we were newlyweds (because of our obvious affection for eachother) and at the end of the trip, one lady came up and said we were an inspiration to her on what was possible in a relationship while she got tears in her eyes. (obviously, we didn't tell anyone we live seperately)
-we only got in one fight, which did get resolved fairly easily
-we ziplined, whitewater rafted, atv'd, and did TONS of other stuff. I almost chickened out on the ziplining (which according to H would have *dramatically* negatively affected our trip) but I did it and he was proud. I did lots of things new to me (that would have scared me) and he liked that a lot
-he gave me so many compliments; many on things I am/was insecure about. This morning as he caressed my tummy, he said "if you got a tummy tuck, would all the stretch marks be gone?" and I explained that some are just too high, so no they wouldn't and he said (drumroll please) "good, because I like them. I know it sounds weird but I do." and he kissed them. Also, I don't have perfectly straight teeth and there is one tooth that can occassionally sort of pokes out of my lips, I guess. We were ML and he started poking at my lip to try to get this tooth to show. (Odd to me.) So he tells me how cute he think it is when it shows and I said "oh. so I guess I shouldn't get braces like I was considering" and he says "OMG-no!! that's [one of the best parts]" My saggy breasts he said were "the most beautiful boobs in the world". !!!
-he said I must have cast some sort of spell on him because he can't get away.
-said that he cries about 'us' sometimes. That recently when we have been doing all these fun things, he cries and wonders why we couldn't do these things when we were 'together'. I said we could do these things going forward and that I was 'sick' from my thyroid. Obviously, I wasn't perfect, and I probably could have tried harder in some areas, but I was ill.
-he's afraid that I'll go back to being a lump on a log. (my response was same as above.) [I just want to throttle him!! he doesn't "get" that the thyroid messes a person up!!UGH!!!!]
-he wants us to take Spanish lesson together
-if we do well with Spanish, he'll take me to Spain
-he said he wants us to spend more time together
-there were several ILYs and lots of ILYs in Spanish during the trip
So, that's all good. There were several pics that were taken of us and me that he thinks are "so cute". On in particular with a blue morpho butterfly being held next to my face. That one is "very special" to him. (the signifigance of this is that he is not one to "gush" about me being cute in a picture.)
The bummer is that once we got home we had a brief R talk. He likes how things are going BUT. There are some things he really likes about being single. (can't tell me what exactly..maybe just being able to do what he wants, when he wants.) He is still taking things day by day. Likes what he sees, but doesn't know where we are headed. His tone of voice was not very assuring.*sigh*
We have lived apart now, for 9 months. People, I am getting impatient. I know I am making headway. really, I do. but as time marches on, I wonder how we will unravel this separation.
Hey Minker, I caught up on your thread- what a roller coaster!! You are inspirational!! As I read your thread, I wondered if I am going to get a surprise "I am 100% done" speech, since it seems like everything is going so well between H and I.
Also, I am getting a little "polluted" in my head with thoughts like "even if we did reconcile, how would I know he isn't going to bail again?"
Tonight will be the first night in 15 days that we won't be in the same bed. I got spoiled. I just hope he'll miss me tonight.
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
