>>but then he follows ME around the house and wants to know why I'm avoiding him??? <<

He's obviously afraid to lose you. I think you need to physically leave the house when he arrives. Just tell him, "Hey sweetie, have a great time with the kids, sorry I have to run, but I have some plans tonight...." Be friendly (even slightly flirty... like "I"m hot and I know it" and VERY HAPPY... remember confident sexy women are very attractive.... that's your 180!!!!.). Act like you have plans with friends (even if you don't. Just go stop by Starbucks -- or get a chocolate martini at a nice resturant bar -- and then go to the book store. That's what I used to do).

When he asks why you are avoiding him, just say you aren't trying to, but you are very busy, and you realize you need to move on with your life. Then maybe say something like, "It's kind of amazing how men sort of know when a woman is seperated. It's like they have this radar!!!!" or "You know, I never realized how attractive I am." Then LEAVE QUICK! Don't say this like you are trying to make him jealous, say it like you are just kind of shocked and surprised by all of this.

Hee hee!!!!

So... you lost 35 lbs. Good for you!!!! Have fun with that. Get some hot, sexy clothes and look like you've got plans and divorced girlfriends to hang out with. (This will really give him something to think of! Believe me, I was exactly where you are...).

Mario Party 8???? Oh brother.... Sounds like he wants to adopt a child rather than be with a woman....

Good for you opening your own account and stockpiling cash (if possible give that to a parent or some trusted family member so it's not in your name or social security number).

Maybe tonight it might be best not to be there when he gets there. Leave a nice note if you like, something like, "Hope you have a great time!" And put a smiley face and your name on the note (no words like LOVE!!!!). And then don't answer any phone calls or text messages if he sends you any over those 3 days. This guy needs to learn what it's like to lose you.

In the meantime, read about detachment on this website. Plan to spend lots of time reading relationship books, books about men (Like "For Women Only") and books about positive thinking.

I understand you love him and you want him back, but the wisest advice I received was to "give a lot of leash."

There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.