I'll try to tie this into some of what I did wrong in my marriage (where soooooo many things were wrong). I made myself needed, and what I thought was irreplaceable. I made my ex dependent on me in so many ways, and being just as codependent as me, more in fact (on top of additional mental illness), she fed on it and it became a vicious circle.
Now imagine, if you will, being that person who's placed in a spot where they need to be there to make me happy. They have to rely on me for so much. They sure do have a lot of pressure on them, huh? If you NEED someone to receive your love, you're giving with expectations, as fig said. An expectation is an assumption. And we all know about those. So, here you are, with you and umption.
It's time for you to figure out what it is in you that makes you crave someone else's acceptance of you. That's what I'm reading here. Accepting your love, your giving, all that you offer, is validation and acceptance of you. This is tough stuff to look at in ourselves, I know as well as anyone. But you're looking for someone else's acceptance and validation. You're not providing that to yourself. Food for thought.
