WOW!! Thanks guys....that was very sweet of you. I did make a boo-boo in one of the post as I tried to explain later. Trying to put myself back in the "time" and how I felt etc. pulls up some bad feelings. That is what I need to be careful about and work on myself. I certainly have not "arrived" yet. As long as we live here on this earth, there will always be room for improvement. There was only One perfect person and He had more compassion than anyone.
It helps more than you know for the encouragement that you gave me. You may have noticed the post from AmyC on my thread right before yours.....well, she is one of my BF (best friends) here on the board b/c she is one of the main people that told me like it was and without her help.....well, I don't want to think of where I would be today. I am no expert by any means, but in my own weak way I just want to try to help others the way I was helped. It does upset me if I think I've been misunderstood or perhaps gave the wrong advice. So, again, thanks so much for your kind words.
CBK, I had just posted over in your thread before coming to check my own. I think I talked about what you brought up just now....lol. We must be on the same wave link. As far as reading the journal and your W saying that the OM and her will always be "soul mates" etc., that is still just part of the "talk" that means nothing. She feels that way b/c he helped her feel emotionally better about herself during a time that she felt drained and empty. I felt all the things she said in her journal. To be completely honest, I still have a hard time on certain days to come up with the energy to "work" on my M, but I think my circumstances at this particular time is somewhat different than those of younger couples. Hope that doesn't sound like an excuse, but don't want to get into a long drawn out explanation. What I'm trying to say is basically the same old...same old....patient and time. It has taken me a year to really get to where I am now. My H and I have not had a fight or harsh words or anything of that nature in the past year.....since he confronted me about OM and my decision to stay in the M. But, it took ME a long, long time to "come around" to trying to be the W to him that I needed to be. I had to work through a "process" by myself and with God's help. I hope that all makes sense. I am still struggling b/c I get frustrated at my H. He is very different from me and he isn't one that "makes things happen" so to speak and has always sat back and waited on me to do the work. There were many, many years of resentment built up inside of me and I allowed very high walls to build up around my heart for protection. Anyway, if you have read my story, you know the stitch. You guys have been helpful to me, too, I want you to know that.
I won't give up on you! Don't worry about that.
JoieDeVivre, I will look you up in Newcomers and read your stitch. Glad to have you visit my thread. It got so slow that I almost forgot to check it out...lol. Newcomers is the busiest thread IMO and a good place to build a support system. It also helps to go to other forums and read threads that you think may be helpful to you.
So, I can't seem to write short post.....lol.
Talk to you later.
Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
