To Hope or Not to Hope?

[MichelleLT]

After 9 years, I think you do know what his good aspects are.

As for the personality differences and working styles, that is the divorce trap - that is how people convince themselves and life will be easier w/o their partner or with a different partner. No matter who you choose to be with, there WILL be differences. The important thing is to minimize them through the DB techniques. So, unless there is something really bad there, finding a new H won't actually help, you'll just substitute a new person and bring the same set of problems to the new R.

So, you are sure the bad things could change if he decides to come back. It sounds to me like that is a darn good reason to give it a shot.

MLC/QLC crisis spouses, and even your generic WASs, say and do BIZARRE and MEAN things. It is just a phase, but it can last for months or longer depending on the person. He is going through a huge crisis inside his head, so of course he is going to act weird.

Worst case scenario, you go your separate ways. But at least you tried everything.