It's Starting

[Lissie]

Well.

My kids are going with Javier to Susan's kid communion.

Like one happy family.

I will pick out their nicest clothes, and tell them to have fun, and enjoy themselves. To be respectful in church and to make sure they listen to their dad.

And my heart is about to break, on the inside right now.

Because, those are MY babies
she should not get to see them dressed up, she should not get to see them interact with people, in their beautiful way that they do interact with people.
she should not see them smile, or laugh
b/c she is part of the reason they hurt.

I talked to him about the communion, very calmly actually. He said I know how hard this is for you. I thank you so much that you are not yelling at me Whatever.

He should be thanking me for not kicking his sorry ass into next week

I said please tell the kids before hand. They hate when you surpise them with a visit to her house.

He said to me, I don't even talk to her when we are there. I tell her not to hug them, or hold her hand out to them. They don't even say good bye to her. He said I know they don't like her.

I said well she is part of the reason, their dad is gone. No matter how many times I tell them it is ok to like her.

I said, I am just waiting to hear the engagement news already, and I know that I will probably be the one that has to tell them b/c you know how you are with communication.

He says to me, Um don't hold your breathe, there is none of that in my future. (yeah right)

UGH.

He said to me, I know how much this hurts Lis, I went thru it with my dad.

I said then you were supposed to PROTECT your kids from that pain.

He said nothing.

One more thing to get used to I guess. Blech

UGH, and I have never seen them together either. Can't wait for that day of joy.

I have come a long way tho, Jesus, I can have a conversation with him about her, even tho, I don't say the name Susan. It will be whore forever it seems.

And he NEVER defends her. NIIIIICE

MEN!

Rant off.

Bar is soooooo open.

[BigHands]

Irish Car Bomb, please!

[BigHands]

And life goes on, whether we like it or not, and however it does.

So, you can't change that stuff. You can change you and their safety with you.

But you already know that and do that, I bet.

So, it's something to just let flow by and enjoy being you instead.

Because you don't have to live with doing what he's done.

[AmyC]

Lissett - I know you're not ready for this but when you feel you can, consider it is not Susan the whore that broke up your family. It was Javier. Your anger is displaced. You know where to take it.

I'm sorry if I'm out of place posting over here. Feels like I am.
Nevertheless, you and I go way back. Don't let this anger have a stranglehold on you. It will break your beautiful spirit.



Amy

[Trip]

That's tough Lissie. I can't imagine.

One thing though that he said I find total BS. "He said to me, I don't even talk to her when we are there". What a load of crap. How can that even be possible?

Yeah, and the part where they have gone through it kills me. Why do they all say that and then turn around and do the same. Makes no sense. Then again, they rarely do!

[Lissie]

Irish car bomb, is that a drink? I will have to order one of those one day.

Amy. You are totally right. I am not so angy as much as hurt. I know myself. I just need to cry it out and pray about it and just feel the emotions of it, and I will be better.

I don't want to be angry at Javier either. I don't want to be angry period. Ick, it's not me. So yes, I will not allow him or anyone else to break my spirit. Thanks you, doofus.

Trip, I know, I just don't get it either. Thanks guys.

[BigHands]

It is a drink. A magnificent drink.

1/2 pint of Guinness or Murphy's stout

Drop in a shot glass that is 1/2 Jameison's Irish Whisky and 1/2 Bailey's.

Shoot it before the Bailey's curdles.

A few of those, and everything's good.

[fig]

and I would like whatever would f me up the most with vicoden and aleve!!!

and

javiar

well you know what I think

and

susan

may be susan someday but she will always be a whore
she is not the reason your marriage broke up but still

but I know you and you will not 5 years from now still be calling her names (unless it is for a good laugh)

so call away

safe her

and smoooooooooooooooch M&m for me and then bring them here so I can show them hoodrat ways to deal with punks!!!

[fig]

and I would like whatever would f me up the most with vicoden and aleve!!!

and

javiar

well you know what I think

and

susan

may be susan someday but she will always be a whore
she is not the reason your marriage broke up but still

but I know you and you will not 5 years from now still be calling her names (unless it is for a good laugh)

so call away

safe her

and smoooooooooooooooch M&m for me and then bring them here so I can show them hoodrat ways to deal with punks!!!

[fig]

damn figgying!!!