I hear ya. Tomorrow is our baby's 1st birthday. We went through so much to help him fight for his little life and we have such a strong intimate connection, as you say. My H won't be here to celebrate with us. It's hard. The baby looks just like him but with my blue eyes. Watching him grow and accomplish new things each day and knowing that his daddy, who loves him very much, is missing it all and will continue to miss most of it....well, it just breaks my heart.
