Drowning still - 23 years, feel like I am sinking

[FaithfulH]

tomorrow have IC and L to talk to. I will see what IC says about L as well, but right now, I am in a good place about L. Not to draw up papers or to go behind her back, but just so I know what my legal rights are in CA. I will tell W if I go. I thought about telling her tonight, but figured I better go first!

CBK,

Be careful with how you handle this with your W! What are you going to say? I was looking through your stuff and I found out you have a L so I'm gettin' one too?....Or I just thought you should know that I went to see a L today? Both of these are loaded with problems. This is why I tried to tell you to wait. Some Lawyers will only spin you up on all the fears you should be aware of....remember they make more money if you D...not R! I don't mean to say that every lawyer is unethical...just remember what feeds THEIR kids. This is an area where others will surely have a different opinion. I established mine based on these 3 things:

• IF your W has a L and you get papers, you will have plenty of time to respond
  
• You might be wrong about what you THINK your W is doing....and you wouldn't know about it anyway except for the snooping
  
• Lawyers don't generally help you move TOWARDS reconciliation

Hope this helps!

BTW, I am glad you are grounded again! Stay strong for the battle!