The recent distance between us has been very painful for both of us and I have come to a place where I simply MUST make clear to you how our situation is affecting our marriage. While things have been peaceful lately, I am still very, very concerned as to the viability of our marriage. Rebuilding our marriage is my number ONE priority, but I need your help.
You already know that I love you very, very much. I always have. I hear you when you express some of your needs as far as the load that you carry, and you need for some help in bearing it.
I understand that you are feeling poorly…that you feel overwhelmed…and you feel that there is lack of support from me. I would like to give you that support. I have been looking for things to do to help you out and will continue to be looking for ways to keep your needs in mind as we feel our way through this.
Recently you expressed a resentment that has lingered for a great deal of time. I suspect that there may be other resentments that you have not expressed. I encourage you, in your prayer time and meditations, to try to define these and pass them on to me regardless of how you think they may impact me. I can take it. I just need you to put all your cards on the table so we can deal with these issues.
I still look at you and see the only woman I ever felt this level of passion for. I love you deeply and want so much for us to finally have the kind of closeness that I had always had in my minds eye. I need to know that that is what you want too. If you are fine with just the roommate arrangement or you are, truly, “done” with trying to improve our relationship, I understand. I need you to be committed as much as I am…I cannot do it by myself…WE need to do this TOGETHER.
me
This is my edit. It's STILL pretty long, especially for someone who is overwhelmed and feels you are needy.
What do you think. Can you go with less?
What do you REALLY HAVE TO HAVE as your goal.
It is unrealistic to expect her to be AS COMMITTED AS YOU ARE. She won't be there yet. But a willingness to work, to begin....what can you accept?
sg Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
