I had a physical affair with my wife's best friend 3 years ago. After 6 months, we got back together and started working on our marriage. Most recently, 7 months ago the same woman I had an affair with contacted me and we started talking on the phone back and forth. The talks were just about each other's lives and where we were at now. They were completely platonic. After a few months, my wife and her ran into each other and started their friendship back up. Two months after that, my wife found out that we had been talking and said she wanted a divorce. That was the end of December. February 13th she presented me with divorce papers.
Current Events:
We have had one court date to determine custody and living arrangements until the D is final. She is currently living with friends and will be moving into her own place April 9th.
She told me a couple days ago that it is IMPOSSIBLE that we will get back together and that I was never focused on her in this marriage. She said that the woman I had an affair with told her that I said I was only still married because of the kids. I told her that I said no such thing. What I did say was that we would probably have been divorced by now if we didn't have kids.
Well, just last night my son told me in front of my wife that they went to a woman's house and he had fun. I said who's house? He said he didn't know. So, I asked my wife and she said it was this same woman that I had an affair with. She went over there with the kids, our kids played with her kids, they all hung out, had sandwiches, and talked. I asked what for. She said she wanted to know what me and this other woman had talked about. So I asked, what did you find out? My W then said that the other woman confirmed everything I said.
So, here are my questions:
1. Isn't it obvious my W's friendship with this other woman is more important to her than her marriage to me?
2. My W was supposed to come over to hang out tonight, watch Survivor, and look at my vacation pics. Should I cancel?
3. I want to tell her, "I need to stop hanging around you. I need to remove my feelings for you and get on with my life." Should I do that?
I am so DAMN confused. Seriously, WTF is she thinking?
