Intellectually, I know that this is not what i've just done this weekend; but on an emotional level i feel like I've just marched H that much closer to walking... Here's how;
We flew down to Houston on Friday to attend wedding for H's brother. Using lousy Mapquest directions, heading into downtown became confusing. H (driving) always gets easily agitated at things like this, typically in my (navigator) direction, so starts barking. We fairly easily got ourselves righted and to the hotel; then some confusion with the valet parking, and H is barking again about lowering the window. I said "Ok", and then under my breath (I thought) said "F...U" which, of course, he heard....and said "WHAT!" I apologized the next morning for the harshness of my language at him; that the stress of the situation didn't call for that kind of a response... but clear that damage was done... not a very mature way to set a boundary, huh?
Then on Sat. pm., S12 left rooftop pool to go get ready for wedding (all 3 guys in wedding). I was coming down a little later, intending to help get him ready. H calls, clearly irritated, wanting to know if I'm coming down to help out. I get there with about 20 minutes to go; H VERY frustrated, saying how he has to get himself and also 2 boys ready... this time (while I was thinking to myself...chill out) just said, gosh, I'm sorry, I thought this was enough time...which of course it was.
I'm just so tired of this; really starting to have a hard time acting 'as if' for another 6 weeks or so (at which time I'm assuming H will drop his 'moving out' bomb...)
When that time comes, I'm guessing there's going to be a very non-DB blow out on my part... I hope not, but I am so angry at the position he's going to be putting our Ss in that I don't know that i will be able to avoid it...
