Do you ever have those days where you just feel hopeless about your sitch? Like there is nothing you can do to change things? I am losing faith that this will work out at all.
I have these feelings every day lately. What really drew me to DB was the possibility that there were things I could DO to change our sitch - to save M even if H wasn't interested. I'm not so sure this is going to work for me. So, I have been thinking about not having hope. One of the things that I have realized in the last day or two is that my hope has been fixated - it has been conditional on getting exactly what I want, which is M and H back in my life. Now, I am trying to reframe what I hope for - to hope for happiness/fulfillment in whatever form it takes. I don't think that means that I have to stop wishing/preferring for M to be restored - but, really, I am still working on how to process this. And - I'm afraid we really do have to experience these emotions. I keep trying to control what I feel and that is just holding me in place and making me feel worse. I think it is that way for everybody.
me: 47 H: 48 he has 2 grown sons M 1995(my 1st, his 3rd) hit iceberg 6/07 S 9/26/07 before now
