He wants you to make all the concessions to make his sitch easier. You shouldn't punish others for your own choices -- and that's what he is trying to do to you and the kids.
Yes, I agree with everything you both say. And I should be careful b/c he is a lawyer so I always need to think about that before I email, say, or do anything which of course sometimes I forget!!! And I don't want to be in his face or increase his anger. I really have been making efforts to try to get along with him as much as possible! I plan on sending that revised email (thanks sg !!!) tomorrow (he is incommunicado with OW tonight when I tried to contact him re: his wanting to borrow my car and I was trying to let him know he could use it while his in the shop.) Karen