After 3 long years, H is home

[Snow White]

First, IMO, she made it VERY personal by using "I" instead of "We" (the refinery). Second, the card is in the shape of a heart (WTF??!!!). Lastly, she is speaking H's primary LL (WOA) BIG TIME, and to me, that spells trouble in a BIG way. OW and the girl H dated before moving back in catered to his ego in this way all the time.

Its ok to be worried, I think my biggest problem here would be the shape of a heart(especially if it isn't the refinery stationary). But I would think, and I don't know your H, that if it was something that he thought would raise flags he wouldn;t be throwing it down on the table for you to pick up. As far as her using the word I, I think that my employer and supervisors would do the same, it comes more from an area of them thinking that they themselves are extrememly important than it does from an aspect of intimacy.

However, I always KNOW in my gut when he's hiding something.

I am not going to argue with intuition and I also always know when my H is hiding something, the key is what. Is it possible that he was being untruthful but it has nothing to do with a possible OW?

My H told me he is here for one reason, and for one reason only. It is to "raise the children the right way". To "give them the father I never had". "They are ALL I care about. I don't give a sh** about what happens between you and me."

Did he recant this statement at a later point? I think that if you consider the circumstances that he said this solely to hurt you in the moment. If you look at your situation for 3 years he was not at home with his boys, the only thing that a diforce would have made different is it would have severed his ties to YOU. You could have gone through with the divorce and he would have seen them the same as he did the previous 3 years. The thought of finally losing you seemed to be what brought him back.