Internet friendships?

[kolle]

She told me on wednesday that the summons was now definetely in the post, and said I should go see somebody for anger management so I can be more "normal" -- until I move out (until the judge forces me out) I told her my anger is "normal" for my situation (read the books!), but that I would see someone if she agreed to see someone about her EA. She asked what difference does it make, I said it would remove one major lie from between us: That she did everything in her power to try to save our marraige. If she really tried to save our marraige that EA would never have happened. She says OK, but it will make no difference to the divorce. I say OK, but you will have to live with your conscience.

So my part of the deal is to see someone for anger management. I am sitting there, wondering where to find someone when one of our pastors and his wife walk into my surgery for a checkup, nothing wrong with them, they just want a checkup. I remember that they were involved with marriage enrichment courses, so I tell them my story briefly and make an appointment. Last night I go to see him, and lo and behold, this guy follows the same principles as Michele. He has never heard of her but everything he says agrees in principle with DR. So he gives me a strategy to avoid what he calls "being highjacked by your emotions -- your Reptilian brain" (whatever that might be, I visualise a malignant little velociraptor grabbing the steering wheel in my brain) 1)We make a list of taboo subjects. 2)Whenever anybody brings up one of the subject the other one stops the conversation right there. 3)We can only discuss these subjects in the presence of my therapist. Now apparently she has a lot to tell me about the D, I suppose about why I can't get the kids and when she's going to kick me out the house etc. I tell her if you want to discuss it, you have to come with me to the therapist. She says OK. SO, we are going to see a therapist together. Not for counselling but for my anger management and to discuss the practicalities of the D. As far as I am concerned there is only one practical way to do a D, and that is not to do it.

So, I kept my part of the bargain. I am now waiting to see if she keeps her part of the bargain, which is to see her therapist about the EA.

She also agreed to watch Michele's video seminar. I doubt that she really will but I am praying REAL hard that she will. I am not going to push the point though, I think I will just ask her in a week or so if she did.