Hi Ingrid-- wtg on the way you handled the intense situation at the concert. It is so hard, a particularly painful illusion (loved your buddhist philosophy reference), when he is under the delusion that he can do anything he wants and if you don't like it you can just lump it. That only works when you're 12. Great to see you recognize the difference in the way the "old" you would've handled it and the way that works.
I'm glad you found a way to work in acknowlegement of your teeny backslide last weekend-- I know it's been bothering you.
Sweetie, you know exactly what I'm going to say though, He USED to see your point of view. He USED to look at you and connect on a consistent basis. He is coming back to you-- but he's just not there yet and meanwhile you want to keep him from retreating as much as you can.
Living in the now-- being still-- must be particularly tough on you because you've always had to be the adult and manage others. For now though (sorry), you are right. You still have to act "as if" and try not to let this illusion affect you so deeply. You have to guard your heart and keep giving him the space to control his own destiny so he doesn't feel controlled/manipulated by you and instead, comes back to those feelings with his own free will.
Hope you are having a great weekend! Kel
PS. I think you're piecing. It's the hardest part though...
