Hi Liz, It's great to hear from you again - sorry that the circumstances are not better. Here's my two cents for you...
First, I'm glad you are back, and I hope you will stick around. Piecing is tough - I'm sure you'll hear that same message from SD. As nice as it would be to say "OK, we're back together, life is great" - well, a M takes constant work, forever. That's not good news or bad news, that's just the way it is. (Ideally, we could all have learned this lesson without going through the pain of our almost-D sitches! But we didn't, all we can do is pick ourselves up and do our best from here onwards.)
Second, it sounds like you may have backslid a bit from your GALing and PMAing and such? Don't do that, Liz. Remember, that was for YOU, to make yourself happy. If it helped restore your marriage, that was a happy side-effect, but the bottom line is for LIZ TO BE HAPPY.
So, if you have eased up a bit on those things, there's no time like the present to get back in DBing High Gear. You deserve it!
Third, as far as what really happened with H's co-worker. FWIW (not much), my gut says he probably started this, just because that's the way it usually works from my personal experience. The real reaction of sweet young things when approached by an old guy is more often how you spoke of the college girls - as in "you have GOT to be kidding, old man!"
HOWEVER, the bottom line is that it simply does not matter who "started it". Even if she came on to him, totally out of the blue - who cares? The thing that matters for your R is H's actions, not hers. And sorry to say, he has been crossing the line.
So, my question is not "What stupid things has he done that led up to this point?"
My question is "Now that he's put himself into this spot, what is he going to do in the future?"
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
