Didn't think of mentioning this earlier, though I should have. One of the issues my husband and I have is my MIL. Things have gotten better over the past couple of years, but during the first few years of our marriage, my MIL was pretty much the only thing we fought about. During counseling last fall, and this was probably the only good thing that came out from it, my H admitted that early on he would choose to upset me vs. choosing to upset his Mom. In their weird relationship, he would always do whatever he could to smooth the waters for her.
My MIL doesn't really know what the word boundaries means. Not just with me, with my H or anything emotional, but really lacks a lot of social skills. Like "offering" to be best man in our wedding. Who "offers" to be in somebody's wedding? That's something that you get invited to. Anyway, my H just got back from a business trip to Edmonton, Canada and was wearing an Edmonton Oilers hat at dinner tonight that he received as a gift. (180 for me, I didn't point out that even at the casual place at which we were eating, a hat at the table is not polite, though I did tell my son to take off his hat.) My MIL was admiring it. "Wow, what a great hat. Do you have another one?" Completely leading my H on to telling her that yes, he did have another one. The client gave him two. She said that his little brother would really like it as he collects hats and that he should sent it to him. H responds that he doesn't even know where his little brother lives. MIL says to give it to her and she'll give it to little bro. It's an NHL hat and I'm a hockey fan. H knows that. I was wondering if I'd get a crack at the hat! So H says, "Well, that would be OK if CW68 doesn't want it, but I think she might want it." MIL's face fell. Not because it was me, I don't think, but because H didn't just bow to her. I said that I wanted to try it on and if it didn't fit, I'd gladly pass on the hockey hat to my bro-in-law. MIL says, "Hockey? I thought the Oilers were baseball?" which just shows me that I sooooo deserve that hat. Non-hockey fans be darned. This gals from the Detroit area? How can she NOT know hockey?
It's a little thing in the big picture of life, but a nice 180 for my H to pull. yay
Me: 42/H: 37 T: 10 years/M: 8 D9, S8 Bomb: 7.23.07 Separated: 1.20.08 D Final 3.19.09 Affair started in '05, found out parts in 11/07. They married 11.26.09
