I am also an Army wife (I have the "Army Wife: Toughest Job in the Army" on my car BTW ), we survived an 18 month combat deployment, and then he came home, got depressed (possibly also PTSD) and found an OW and started talking separation and D.
I also wanted to comment on your H's age and the age difference - my H never lived alone, he lived with guys during college, family before then, guys in the barracks, me, a roommate or two or three while he was deployed, then came home to me. He was flat out jealous that I got to live alone for 18 months, set my own schedule, manage all our finances, and have my own life. He has never had that, he has never truly been independent, and he didn't have as much of a crazy single college time as a lot of his friends.
Throw in the stress of separations and reunions and a few kids (in your case), it's a recipe for disaster if not handled properly.
You mentioned he has left before but always come back. DR addresses this as the love and intimacy being there, but the changes made during separation not sticking.
As some food for thought, what did you do or not do previously when separated that might have changed his mind?
I'll post more later since I'm at work.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
), we survived an 18 month combat deployment, and then he came home, got depressed (possibly also PTSD) and found an OW and started talking separation and D.
