The pain of what is lost...well, I can only say that it fades with time. Very much like the pain from a surgery I would suppose, in that eventually it goes away completely and all that is left behind is a little scar that reminds us of a painful moment in our life.
As for the rest of the ponderings on this thread lately, I can't really participate.
I still choose to believe that this phenomenon was an emotional shift in my former spouse. It's too depressing to look back on twenty years and somehow believe that all those moments were lies. Something happened inside her and suddenly what once mattered, stopped mattering. What was once important, was suddenly unimportant.
You can't forsee that kind of thing.
I guess I'm saying, I didn't make a bad choice.
She did.
The good news for FIB, and others who are moving through the very difficult final days, is that life gets very good again. And much more quickly than you would think. I'm as happy as I've been in a very long time. More importantly, I am as at peace inside as I think I've ever felt.
Yes, there are details of this new life that are worrisome at times (money and kid schedules top the bill here!), but there are also great opportunities to move in directions you might never have gone. It's a real chance to change your course and maybe move it back in line with where you always saw yourself heading one day.
If you're reading FIB, stay strong.
I'm glad she is calmer lately. Know that there will still be rough spots, but maybe we can at least hope that the pettiness is done for a bit.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
