Wow, Kris! Things are really beginning to look brighter over here! Awesome.
"NJF" is a GREAT book, IMO. Dr. Glass firmly believes, as do I, in NC between the UP and AP once the UP has made a new and active commitment to the M again. She's wonderful at explaining the necessary steps to take in rebuilding the R and building goodwill with one another.
If your H is willing, it would be very helpful if he read it, too. It might be a little emotionally difficult for the both of you to deal with, to realize how things got to the point that they did, but it IS needed to recover. Very important.
I heard that "After the Affair" by Janis Spring is a good one, too, for both spouses to read. I read it, too, back then - 3 years ago - but don't remember much of the book. Only that it helped me understand and cope with all of the emotions I was going through.
Root suggested I should read "Getting Back Together", too. Haven't looked into getting it yet though. Suppose I ought to, and quickly!
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell
