Every time you argue and/or fight with your H, you are reinforcing for him (in his mind) why he is leaving you and that he will be happier without you. He is associating you with negatives because of these negative situations you are allowing to take place when you fight with him.
Remember that your H should not have any control over YOUR actions and reactions -- only his own. Every time you allow HIS actions and/or reactions to dictate your behaviors, you are losing the battle -- both the battle to save your M, and the battle to grow from this experience into a better person.
