I'm so sorry your sitch is similar to mine b/c I know how much it hurts me, so I know how much you hurt as well. I will soon be able to not care what they think of me, but it does hurt in the meantime. They were a close family that I had grown to love. They have their issues, but they had that closeness my family never did growing up.
As I went through all the "evidence" W is piling up against me I saw she is using my admissions of progress made in therapy as well as notes I jotted down in the books I was reading as proof that I was an angry, controlling man. I'm not planning on refuting one word of what I've written concerning my growth through therapy. I am someone who has had problems in the past and I am facing my issues head-on. I'm unafraid to discuss this w/ the parenting evaluator (which I did from the start) as well as any judge in the land b/c they are the truth. I'm a flawed human being who is fighting to fix himself to become the best man I can.
I'm hoping the evaluator and the courts will see these things as positives, not negatives as I'm taking responsibility for myself and acting to improve as a human. My W certainly isn't doing any of this and I can only hope they'll see the truth.
LATEST UPDATE... W sent me an e-mail this morning refuting my claim that I thought our discussions were only centering on the upcoming weekends and she ended w/ this zinger: "D was VERY tired this morning -- as she always is when she comes home from seeing you. She really didn't want to get up and go to school." I didn't respond to it.
She then sent off another one telling me when I would see my D over the next few weeks. There was no discussion, only a "here is the schedule."
I replied, kindly told her I was misunderstanding our last conversation about D seeing me, and then asked politely about adding another day to my next visit w/ D.
W replied telling me she is tired of fighting w/ me on the schedule, I knew exactly what I was asking for, and she was through negotiating w/ me. She ended w/
Quote:
Please clarify something for me. The fax your attorney sent my attorney clearly stated that you are not fighting me for 50% physical custody. If not, then why are we seeing a parenting evaluator? Since you don't want 50% physical custody of D, what is your proposal?
I replied asking for a few more days for visitatin to get us closer to 50/50 time as she will have D for 14 of the next 20 days under her proposal. I then made sure to answer her questions above by writing the following:
Quote:
As for custody, I have maintained all along that I am seeking 50/50 parenting time w/ D and 50/50 joint legal custody. I am not fighting against you for this custody and I never have been. I am simply asking for what I am legally entitled to concerning parenting time and legal custody in the state of Arizona.
I think this was the right thing to do as the DB coach told me to answer her questions, but to be concise and to the point.
When and if she responds, there will be no more bartering b/t us on this situation. I will simply say how I'd like to see her, but I won't be taking her bait on this. I'm hoping that I'm not taking her bait too much right now as it is.
It is a difficult and long process. I'm hanging tough, but I'm worn down.
