H is Having Affair after all - Part 2

[seekpeaceofmind]

It is so hard to have these choices thrust upon you - none of this is what you would want if things were going your way, but there it is. I think it is normal to be mad and I would also feel controlled right now. I think that the key is to make your decisions based on criteria that are impartial and supportable. Your emotions - how you feel about it - may be one criteria, but not the only one. With the house, you might prefer on an emotional level to keep it (better for the kids, easier for you, it's a "win" over your H), but what are the other criteria that you have to consider in terms of money, upkeep, location, etc? This is why it is so good that you are working with a solicitor - like you said, she can help you sort through your decisions and confirm if they are viable or not.

Your feelings are normal - but try not to give them too much power over you. You are a positive, caring person. Does it help to picture your H in the MLC "fog"? When I was able to think of this as a time of illness in my H's life, it made it easier for me to cope with the thoughts of rejection and abandonment.