You are so correct that my h did come and go many times and continued to self medicate with the ow. It took almost 2 years for him to finally hit bottom and seek C. That started his journey back up from the pits of he11.
I did notice that when me h was coming and going, each time there was more improvement in him. I was like the Super 8 hotel, I left the light on for him! Sometimes I didn't know if I was doing the right thing but as it turned out it was the right thing for my sitch.
You are the only one who gets to decide how to make it through this situation with your husband. I have always been impressed with your patience during this mess.
I really don't think anyone is suggesting that you divorce your husband. I know that I am not. For while I am divorced myself, I still consider marriage vows a sacred thing, not something to be let go easily.
My concern for you before was the effect of your husbands continued interaction with his other woman while living with you. I believe that this is wrong and should not be tolerated. I believe, as Michelle herself states in a posting on the infidelity thread, that the wandering spouse must do everything in his/her power to assure and prove to their spouse that they are remorseful and have broken all contact with their adulterous partner. Period.
The most important thing right now is that YOU find a way to have peace for you and your children. Your husband must find a way to take care of himself.
Wishing you peace.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
The no contact does work. Out of the blue, I received texts and a phone call lastnight from H.
He thanked me for leaving him be and we talked some.
He is going to contact me again tonight.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
He said he loves me and misses me and knows he is still spinning.
NO divorce, though.
He wanted to know why I still stand by him and love him. We texted for awhile and then he called me and we talked for about an hour. And he asked that I continue to pray for him as he has messed up his life and is miserable. Hates being over there.
Last edited by steelersfan; 04/22/0804:00 PM.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
