If you ascribe to 'he made me that way' then you're making yourself a victim. Your sense of empowerment goes by the wayside, replaced by a growing sense of powerlessness.
I made myself powerless in my relationship because I deferred too much to him for what I thought were the right reasons. It was easier to adore and revere him than disagree over something. It was easier to be passive rather than assertive.
I went away for a week alone. Although I've traveled quite a bit, I've never gone someplace by myself, without knowing others. Let me tell you, it was great. The bubbly person full of joy and caring surfaced. I became centered, something that is great in dealing with all this crap.
Taking accountability for my actions improves who I am.. there's nothing wrong with the 'oops' factor. Oops, I made a boo-boo, forgive myself and move on.
Just because I make mistakes doesn't mean I'm a failure! It just means I'm human and have the opportunity to learn from them.
