Sorry you're going through this. Sounds like you're doing okay all things considered.
Carson City is a long drive from San Jose - why would someone drive there and back in a day? Strange.
I know how your imagination starts driving you crazy - you have to try and stop those thoughts or it WILL drive you crazy. Someone posted on my thread awhile ago about imagining a big stop sign. I think this is DR too. Anyway, it works. So does distracting yourself.
I would try to detach with love rather than being cold. Coldness just makes things worse whereas concentrating on yourself but keeping things pleasant with her shows her the positive person she's losing. It also allows you to take the high road no matter what happens.
