It is hard, I know, you read my sitch, I did all the same things you are doing... R talks, feeling weak, crying, cant live without W.
I am trying to tell you what has worked for me. But you need to be able to do it for yourself, not for your W.
Dont tell friends, as you will force them to pick a side, and when this all blows over you will wish you had never said anything. I know the desire to tell someone and have them on your side. So pick a good male friend or 2. Tell them and let them sympathise with you. Make sure you let them know you want the M to work and you odnt want them to tell you to `leave the bitch`.
You cannot read your Ws mind. You dont know that she is all doom and gloom all the time. She could feel down because she hurt you, because she misses the OM, because she realises she needs to let OM go, or any of anther million reasons. Not all of them are detrimental to your M. This is something I had to get over. My Ws mood is not dependant on me. If she looks down after work it is very likely she had a bad day at work.
Things are bad now, and they may get a little worse IF you keep going on this course. Be a man, do you honestly think that if your W up and left tomorrow you would instantly stop breathing and die? Of course not. You are a man, go out and catch a sabre-tooth tiger or something...
You have things to be positive about. I want you to list the things you can be positive about. DO IT! HERE!
Listen to your W.
Understand this is going to take time.
You seem to be religious. Dont think about this crap has happened to you.. oh woe is me. Think of it as an oppertunity, God is preparing you for something in the future, he is making you stronger. For all your weakness now, you will come out of this stronger.
Where are those flowers?
Cheers
Steve
Me 27 W 30 M 2yrs/ T 5yrs Expecting our first child Sept 08 warning bomb (has feelings for someone) 21/12/08 I found out about OM (by snooping) 14/1/08 Living together.
