Totally Lost after 23 years

[CBK]

Thanks Addie - much appreciated. I was very weak last night and this AM - I feel horrible about it and I know I took one giant step backwards.

The only good news I could find is that there were three letters that were addressed to me and the kids, thought they were dear john letters, but during the conversation, W said they were when she was really feeling despair. I asked her to please take them and put them with her private stuff as the snooping is too tempting. She went upstairs to journal in her room and I am sure saying how last night went and our conversation - which will NOT happen again that way. Then she read the letters and I heard her crying. That was in her worst of times and not knowing where she was going - but I am hopeful the letters said how proud she was of us as a couple and how proud she was of me on the things I did in my life. That was right about 2000 when she wrote those, so hopefully they will help her re-write history.

Next piece of good news is that I have a two day trip on Monday, so no WAY I can snoop or hopefully get into a R conversation.

thanks