The secret to true, deep happiness and contentment is found in the realization that love is a verb, not a noun. It requires action, even when we don't feel like it. And often, when we put forth the effort to act, the feelings will follow. It's a leap of faith.
Aud said it exactly. Love is a verb. Love is a decision. You have decided to love the wrong person. That will not stop until you decide to love the right person. When you make the decision, and you actively act in loving ways towards your husband, you will lose the desire to act in loving ways towards the other men. When you put forth the effort to act, the feelings will follow. It's true. Most people want it to happen the other way. But it doesn't. It is important that you get positive reinforcement from your husband when you act with love towards him. Until you get to Retrouvaille, you can help your marriage by being nice to each other, such as acting as you would if you were on a date. And you should acknowledge the good things the other does that you notice. For example, if he picks up the child at school. You should thank him for helping you. If he cooks a nice meal, you should compliment him. This simple polite treatment of each other is probably the single most important thing you can both do to heal you marriage.
