I understand the spark thing. I do. But it's not the most important thing in life. It's better in the long run to find love and sex at home with your own husband. I know that sounds like old fashioned advice, like eat your vegetables. But it is true. Love with a husband waxes and wanes, and sometimes it's difficult to identify the feeling because it doesn't sweep you up and carry you away like the other. But in your case there must be something there, or you would have married the younger guy. I don't believe the soulmates idea anymore. I think that is fantasy made up by people in love. Nobody stays in love like that. That is a form of temporary insanity. You couldn't live your whole live like that. Not without changing love objects all the time like you are doing. Think about it. Would you do that with your child? Would you love him for the first 2 years of his life and then fall in love with a different child and reject him? Perhaps you can only love infants, but not older children. (Let me tell you, teens are hard to love.) But no, you wouldn't do that. But that is what you are doing to your husband. You are in love with being in love. So Rapunzel, pull your hair up and quit looking for a new white knight to rescue you from your life. Live your life. Accept that it is work, and it's not always fun. And find the good in what you've got. You are missing out on the good things under your nose while you are looking for happiness somewhere else.
