MLC is CRAZY!!! What a Roller Coaster!!!

[2ndnoah]

Treese, I will get this book. I can use all the help I can get. I understand your not sleeping. It would be nice to sleep one night without the nightmares, without taking anything to make you sleep, and mostly for me.....to have my hubby to snuggle up with. We would always snuggle up (for 25 years) and normally wake up the same way. He is snuggling up with someone else, now. That just breaks my heart. I am so hurt. I do not know what to think anymore. I barly make it to work these days. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I too am praying for everyone here. I also pray so much that I too wonder if anyone is listening up there. It sure doesn't seem like it. I have prayed every which way from demanding, to asking, to questioning, to begging and pleading. Nothing is working. Absolutely NOTHING. I had a parent from my school call me and tell me that she had seen hubby with his girlfriend at the mall and it was back before he left me as well as has been constantly since. I was crushed! Yesterday, my youngest son had a track meet. Both of my boys were there. My hubby was too. He did not even say HI to my boys. He sat there for 4-5 hours talking on his cell phone to his girlfriend. My boy's knew what he was doing. Hubby had a new look, new hair style, new clothes, new shoes, new everything even the chair that he brought to sat in. He smiled and laughed and was happy the entire time he was talking to his girlfriend. The looks on his face were the same looks that he use to get when I would talk sexy to him. This all just crushes me. I am lost as to what to do. My boys, God my boy's! They are so torn up. They hate him. They want nothing to do with him. And everyone was so close before. I have wanted to email my hubby and ask many questions, but every time I ask my co-workers if I should they all seem to agree, NO DON'T! I have always been able to make up my mind, and make my own choices. Now I don't even trust myself to make a meaningless choice. I am now asking everyone before I do anything. I evaluate everything to. Every move I make, everything I buy, or do.

It sounds like you are just a few months behind me. I too would not file because I need hubby's money, insurance, etc. He got advise from someone, because he cut the money off right at the first of the month right when all the bills were due. I have paid the bills as I always have since he has been gone (at that time it was 5 months). I have operated under the idea that my hubby is coming home. I have not went crazy spending money. I did not burn or cut up his clothes, etc. But without notice, no money. He didn't even tell me. I found out by calling the bank to make sure the money was in there before I paid bills. It was zero balance. He not only cut the money but withdrew all the money in checking and savings. Then he wanted to meet with me and go over the bills and for me to give the bills to him to pay. IF YOUR HUBBY WANTS TO DO THIS AND YOU ARE THE ONE THAT HAS PAID THE BILLS>>>>DO NOT, DO NOT GIVE THEM TO HIM. My attorney said if I would have, he would have cut off all the credit cards, too. My boys and I have been living on the credit cards since the money was cut off. Hubby has also gone in and change the passwords to any accounts he can remember so that I cannot pay them online or access them. He cut off our cell phones and the home phone (it was in his name). The courts finally made him turn them back on. He would not sign the temporary support order and so now we are having to have a judge make a ruling on it. Still no money. Our credit rating score was 892 out of 900. That is almost unheard of. Now it is 728. He has always been strict on our credit rating, but right now, he could care less.


I agree with you......something has taken over our husbands. I believe it was aliens!!!! Hee,hee. I know this person is not my hubby. He looks like him, but he sure is not the man and father I know, have trusted, and would love til the end of time. My hubby still denies that he has OW. He has this good guy image he obsesses over. He has his family all convinced that I am crazy and that all I do is accuse him of having an affair and there is no one. He has told them that is one reason why he left is that I was always accusing him of OW. Whatever!!! I remember asking him 3 times about OW other than that I never dreamed he would have cheated and is cheating on me.

Treese, I know this is a crazy time in our lives. People tell me we will get through it. I wish God would answer my prayers. I have asked him to create doubt in the choices hubby is making, to allow him not to be dependent on her or others that are rewarding, encouraging him, and reinforcing him in his decisions and them the same. I have asked him to bring someone into hubby's life that will give him God's words and will promote marriage, family, commitment, etc. Hubby is so far from God right now. I wonder if he even believes. I have asked God to bring this family back together and make us stronger than ever and to not let evil win. To use us to witness to other families and couples that are experiencing the same thing. NOTHING, NOTHING, NOTHING. I am beginning to wonder if there is a heaven.

My boy's are what I live for right now. They are the reason why I am still here. I am still in shock about all this. 7 months and you would think I would get over it. Not. I am beginning to think there is something wrong with me. Why did he do this? Why? And why are my boys and I having to experience this?

I do not think my hubby will ever come home. I absolutely want him to, but I think he won't. What was so bad with our life and me that he made this choice and is sticking with it. He is so angry with me. He acts livid when I am around. In the 31 years we have been together, I have never seen him act or feel this way towards anyone. Why is he angry with me? What have I done? Someone tell me so I can fix it.