Just checking in on your sitch. Everyone is different, but my current tack is to maintain the friendship to a certain degree. I guess I see that as "detaching with love," which a lot of people around here talk about. I have no clue how it's affecting my WAW, but I don't care anymore. I still love and care for her, but I need to take care of myself. Detaching with love allows me to do both, and also shows her a positive person who's busy and who'd be a great catch, without getting into the negatives of R talk or burdens of shared baggage, etc.
Just sounded to me in your long post that things were getting a little intense and, if you're retreating, maybe you should consider keeping things a little lighter.
