I agree with Upside....I don't think there are any hard and fast rules about this. As there are no hard and fast rules about MLC, though we tend to think there are, and derive patterns from what we see in some and want to see in the rest.
I think in amicable breaks, like the ones Angelica described, I don't doubt that there is a lot of love there. In those splits, there are two people who cannot be together, but still love each other. It took a lot to break the love I had for my xh, so I can imagine if things didn't get that messy, I would still love him, and vice versa.
But, in my case, and the case of many of the WASs here, who go on a very dysfunctional path, it isn't love that is the root of keeping us in their lives. At least I don't choose to look at it that way - it serves no purpose for me to do so. My xh does keep talking about me, lies about me, slanders me at any chance....this after he's been through many other women....so why get stuck on me?
BEcause he loves me? Misses me? Regrets his mistakes? Nope. Because I'm just the easy target to blame for his very dysfunctional and mentally ill life. Because I'm not there, because it's the most visible event in his life that he can use as a cover.
