OK, you CAN do this. To be fair and to be 'by the book' yourself.
You can file an amendment, claiming 2 kids, and tell the tax folks that you and MItch never got it in writing and that he took the kids. That will force him to do the same.
I'm doing that for last years taxes and claiming half the deductions xh claimed all for himself.
As a fellow LBS of an 'it's all about me' academic, I've followed your threads for a long time but never posted, but want you to know how your strength and goodness have inspired me over the last months...
If this agreement is not 'legal', then PLEASE take A14's advice and filed an amended return...that's A LOT of money....thousands of dollars in reduced income, and $2k right off the top of your final bill...not to mention the $600 stimulus.
This strikes a real chord with me, because the whole financial implication of what's likely to be happening to me down the road is one of my remaining fears (I'm also in academics, but as a lowly paid administrator...). I am the financial person in our household, and the changes we will have to adapt to are not going to be pretty.
That said, absent a legal document to the contrary, you deserve that $$...sc$$w your self-centered,self-important, insecure H (oh wait, that's my H!!)
I've never posted to you before, but I read... a few of my old pals post to you so here I am.
Did you sign an IRS Form 8332 and give to Mitch, giving him permission to take the kids as his dependents and releasing you of being able to claim them? Because if you didn't, they're YOURS to claim!
Keeping my fingers crossed for you--
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
If they're yours to claim, then take it back, at least 2 of 'em! File an amended return. Then, email him that since you neglected to sign the proper forms, you are filing an amended return.
He can then either choose to file an amended return, too, or risk being audited when the IRS sees that between both of you, you claimed SIX kids.
This sounds mean, Althea, but I want to share this.
You are just doing right by YOU. I know you have kids, but doing this doesn't harm them, or their R with their dad. This is taxes - not fatherhood or family. And, when you stick up for yourself, it's good for you. And, good for you means healthy, happy and strong Althea, great artist, mom, friend and incredible woman...that you already are.
My friend told me, before mediation, that my xh would make it look like I was money-hungry....but to keep by my needs/desire. She said that fighting for your right to $ is the same as saying "this is what I am worth, this is my value" and taking that. You are the FULL TIME mother of your kids. You deserve the claim. You are simply taking that back in an amendment. And, Mitch just needs to be made aware of your decision so he can follow appropriately.
Hey, it's what you need to do. Much like he "needed" to get out of a M, move far away, and lead a new life.
Althea: The advice given is excellent. I really like the post of ALWAYS. I did everything not to cause an uproar with my ex. It never got me ANYWHERE. He never saw goodness or concessions I made - he continued to say I was awful - that's why he left me.
So always do what is best for Althea and those beautiful kids. You won't go wrong with that.